Voltar.

Voltar. Voltar em muitos mais sentidos do que aquele de simplesmente voltar. Voltar, muitas vezes, sem vontade nenhuma. Voltar tanto para o que sempre foi bom e maravilhoso, como para tudo o que era e continua a ser de menos bom, coisas das quais fiz uma pausa, sem pensar na volta. Nesta volta.

Voltar as costas, voltar uma página.Voltar ao antigo, ao que era, ao que já foi, e tentar que seja algo diferente do que era antes, de presente e de futuro. Voltar a focar-me. Voltar a encontrar o ponto de equilíbrio que tantas vezes me dá a sensação que perdi. Voltar e tentar encontrar o meu lugar no mundo, a minha posição nesta vida, e para onde quero ir, depois de ter partido e voltado, e realizado que nunca realmente soube qual esse lugar no mundo a que pertenço.

Voltar a pensar (demais). Voltar a sentir que já não tenho mais escape ou fuga da minha própria mente, que funciona constantemente e nunca me deixa ter um momento ou outro de paz ou mesmo clareza. Voltar a  escrever, porque quando tudo dentro de mim é caos, a sensação de controlo torna-se um pré-requisito para manter a sanidade mental.

Enfim, voltar. Voltar, retornar, continuar, recomeçar. Eu, estou de volta, agora por inteiro, feliz ou infelizmente, dependendo das ocasiões...

Mas estou de volta. Assim. Por aqui.

...

:)

Well I wish there was someone

Well I wish there was someone to love me

When I used to be someone

and I knew there was someone that loved me

as I sit here frozen alone

even ghosts get tired and go home

as they crawl back under the stones

And I wish there was something

please tell me there's something better

and I wish there was something more than this

Saturated loneliness

and I wish I could feel it

and I wish I could steal it

abduct it, corrupt it

but I never can, it's just

Saturated loneliness

Does the silence get lonely

Does the silence get lonely

Who knows?

I've been hearing it tell me

I've been hearing it tell me, "go home"

'cause the freaks are playing tonight

they packed up and turned out the lights

And I wish there was something

please tell me theres something better

and I wish there was something more than this

Saturated loneliness

and I wish I could feel it

and I wish I could steal it

abduct it, corrupt it

but I never can, it's just

saturated loneliness

and the bathwaters cold

and this life's getting old

and I wish I could feel it

and I wish I could feel it

and I wish I could steal it

abduct it, corrupt it

and I wish I could feel it

and I wish I could steal it

and I wish I could feel it

abduct it, corrupt it

but I never can,

I never can

never can

never can

never can

De génio.

Waking Life - um filme em estado puro #5

"They say that dreams are only real as long as they last. Couldn't you say the same thing about life?"

"There's only one instant, and it's right now. And it's eternity."

"The worst mistake that you can make is to think you're alive when really you're asleep in life's waiting room."

Mais citações em: http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0243017/quotes

Brilhante.

Waking life - um filme em estado puro #4

(O que ele diz, em inglês)

The reason why I refuse to take existentialism as just another French fashion or historical curiosity, is that I think it has something very important to offer us for the new century. I'm afraid we're losing the real virtues of living life passionately in the sense of taking responsibility for who you are, the ability to make something of yourself and feel good about life. Existentialism is often discussed as if it's, a philosophy of despair, but I think the truth is just the opposite. Sartre, once interviewed, said he never really felt a day of despair in his life. One thing that comes out from reading these guys is not a sense of anguish about life so much as, a real kind of exuberance, of feeling on top of it, it's like your life is yours to create. I've read the post modernists with some interest, even admiration, but when I read them I always have this awful nagging feeling that something absolutely essential is getting left out. The more you talk about a person as a social construction or as a confluence of forces or as fragmented of marginalised, what you do is you open up a whole new world of excuses. And when Sartre talks about responsibility, he's not talking about something abstract. He's not talking about the kind of self or soul that theologians would argue about. It's something very concrete, it's you and me talking, making decisions, doing things, and taking the consequences. It might be true that there are six billion people in this world, and counting, but nevertheless - what you do makes a difference. It makes a difference, first of all, in material terms, it makes a difference to other people, and it sets an example. In short, I think the message here is that we should never simply write ourselves off or see each other as a victim of various forces. It's always our decision who we are.

Waking Life - um filme em estado puro #3

"Creation seems to come out of imperfection, it seems to come out from a striving and a frustration..."

"words are symbols, are inert, are dead"

Waking Life - um filme em estado puro #2

Just listen to what they say.